Heroes Have the Right to Bleed

In the modern era of polarities, the political rhetoric of views of the truth are often one sided and dialogue becomes nearly impossible. In the area of domestic violence and abuse, this is especially true. On one side there is the push for truth that comes out to protect women and children from misogyny, and this is good. The other side pushes for a silence based on principles of an overly rigorous litigation that frequently leaves the presumed aggressor to be the male at all times, this is wrong. Even should this male be quiet, passive, or in my own case handicapped, the presumption is that men are always the aggressor. The scales are so often unbalanced on all sides of the issue. The problem with this is that it leaves many people unable to leave abuse, and the children get caught in the middle. In cases, such as my own, a father and his children are often left alone and without support and tragedy occurs and sometimes death. Yet statistics on these matters are frequently not enough, because of political cohesion, and their suffering goes unheeded because of this. As such, men and children are left to suffer in silence. Like the cover art, the abused are left chained to their environments, while the abuser is left to peck at the family at their leisure, while the society around them go about their lives. This should not happen! Domestic violence is a human issue, even should the population of males be a smaller demographic. So, when my boys and I were able to get free from the abuse, I knew something needed to be said. A voice needed to be heard. Not one just for myself as a person with a neurological disorder, but for my children and all others in abuse. Here is my story, but also my children's story. It is just as much about their story as it is about mine. It is a story about generational abuse for myself and my progeny. My children and all children are not merely survivors but heroes, in these situations, and as heroes they should not suffer in silence and chained to abuse and violence as a hereditary structure but should be a Prometheus unchained. Men who tried to be good spouses and fathers should also enjoy the perks of their heroic endeavours. Heroes have the right to bleed in the open, not chained in silence and left to suffer for their benign but injured actions. This is especially true for children. However, statistics are never enough. A clinical review is never enough. Their stories must be told, from beginning to end. For with each story told, there is a clearer emotional tie to those that suffer in silence, often for years. With one story told, there is the implicit call to others to tell their story and not suffer in silence. With each story told, courage can be given to others to step into the light and tell their stories, and to acknowledge the human problems we all face. This is our story; this is my story. It is an intertwined story of love, abuse, sorrow over mistakes, and parental guilt at times. Most of all it is a story that, hopefully, will call out to those secret heroes that still suffer that they might bring their story into the light, so that their scars and wounds might be brought into societal clarity. Those that survive are not merely survivors, they are heroes, and they do not need to be invulnerable but have the right to bleed, to show their scars and wounds that come from their sacrifices and losses. This, perhaps, will show others who are also wounded that it is not weakness to be a survivor. It is an act of heroism.